How to prepare for your live draft (and like it)
But I digress. This is a strategy article. It’s not a top 100 ranking, it’s an exercise of who I would draft depending on where my pick is. It’s a worst case scenario, build your team when everyone’s thinking the same things about every player. I go into this with the same strategy, which I have to change for each team as the draft moves on.
What follows is a ten team mock draft according to standard scoring 4pts for a passing touchdown, 6pts for rushing and receiving touchdowns, with one quarterback, one tight end, two running backs, two wide receivers and one flex. I’m not taking it far enough to include kickers and defense.
If this is your first live draft these are the things you need to be thinking about, and if it’s not I’m sure the following won’t hurt.
The order of the draft goes as follows and I’ll throw in a couple of tables with the standing rosters as we go along.
Here’s the teams and the order
#1 Little Lebowski Urban Achievers (LLUA)
#2 The Spread Eagles (SE)
#3 Colosteamer (COLO)
#4 The Badge Lickers (
#5 People Against Goodness And Normalcy (PAGAN)
#6 Cheney’s Hunting Party (CHP)
#7 The Donkey Punchers (DP)
#8 Nuke the Fridge (NTF)
#9 Don Vito’s Purple Surprise (DVPS)
#10 Vanilla Face (VF)
LLUA
#1 The Champ
LaDanian Tomlison
He doesn’t have to be your first pick. He’s at least number two. Anything less and you’re in a league with idiots. But be warned, he won’t end the year as fantasy’s top back, he’s just the surest thing you can take to the bank. I don’t need to sing his praises, because if you don’t know already, but this might be his last year at the top…
He’s 29 years old and he’s got more mileage on him then Indiana Jones. His final stats were great last year but week to week he was a little inconsistent. With that being said he’s one of the greatest backs ever and probably has two or three seasons left as a top pick, but from here on out he could break down. I’m not saying he will, or even that I think he is, but the possibility is there. There’s not many players that have had the touches he’s had at this stage of his career. He’s a special player, but running back is the most demanding position in all of sport. I’ve never owned him, and suffice to say, I don’t want the first pick this year.
Does anyone else think that after a few more years of fantasy football being such a prevalent part of society that kids may just begin to refuse to play running back? I mean, would you let your kid play running back? Isn’t wide receiver the way to go? Shouldn’t Jim Brown be telling LT that he needs to hang it up? Do we really need Rick Reilly traveling to
SE
#2 The Upstart
Adrian Peterson
He’s the best running back in the league and he runs behind a line Kevan Barlow could run behind. Of course his QB is Tavaris Jackson, he’s in a time share, he doesn’t catch many passes, he’s injury prone and he’s inconsistent as all hell.
And after saying all that my head has him ranked number five, but I wouldn’t trust myself not to pick him with the second pick, so I’ll take him here. He’s got the highest ceiling, and he’s also the least consistent, and most susceptible to injury, but he also has a guy who’d be a top thirty pick backing him up, so in a way, he might be the safest guy in the first round (provided you go and get Chester Taylor. If you draft Peterson you better watch everyone else like a hawk. I’d draft
(And speaking of the late, great Kevan Barlow, the more that time goes on the more I can’t help but enjoy his “Coach Hitler” comment about Mike Nolan. It killed me then and it kills me now. Now I know that it’s not fair to compare an NFL coach to one of the most evil men in the history of the earth, and I’m not suggesting that Mike Nolan is evil. I’m just deciding, two years after the comment was made, that I’m referring to Mike Nolan as Coach Hitler. Because I think it’s funny. The fact that an NFL coach could be compared Adolf Hitler is funny because it’s ridiculous. It’s like the Jew egg from Borat, or tossing cock roaches dollar bills to appease them. We live in a society where a man who can’t read was able to manipulate the votes in two separate presidential elections in an era where anyone can go online and see what he did and people get worked up over Don Imus commenting that the
Ummm….yeah…sorry about that, but I’m still referring to him as Coach Hitler.
COLO
#3 Brian Westbrook
Let’s see…McNabb’s in his second year after coming back from a torn ACL, which means he should be 100 percent and Westbrook is the focal point of their offense. I know this might sound crazy, but you might be better off picking at three and having this guy fall into your lap, and in a point per reception (PPR) league he scored higher then LT.
He also took a dive before scoring a touchdown at the end of a game to insure that his team won. If he scored the other team would’ve had a shot to score and then recover an onside kick to score again and win, but Westbrook lay down on th
e one to insure that they’d run out the clock. It’d be an honor to have Westbrook on my team.
Oh, and by the way, how many of your dipshit uncles were referring to Westbrook as a “brainless monkey” that day?
Well, actually, all of them. (Since they didn’t realize that he iced the game by going down)
#4 Joseph Addai
He’s 25, this is his third season. He plays in a high powered offense, he scores touchdowns and he can catch the ball. The one thing that worries me is that he took a couple of bad hits last year, but that aside, he’s primed.
PAGAN
#5 Stephen Jackson
He should be the focal point of the Ram’s offense and he should score twenty touchdowns. He’s the consensus 5th pick and that’s the most desirable spot in the draft. With that being said his head coach is a moron, his O-line is a shambles and every other player on the Rams has a huge question mark next to his name. If it wasn’t for his coach I’d take him over Addai, and maybe I should anyway.
Things get tough after the 5th pick. Up to this point it’s automatic. I’ve got four guys I’m looking at here. (Brady, Moss, Barber, and Gore)
CHP
#6 Marian Barber
There is no reason not to like this guy. He plays for a high powered offense behind a strong O-line for a talented coordinator, his specialty is running in the red zone, he catches passes, and he’s coming out of a time share. It’s a bit of a leap of faith because Wade is a chump, but the sure things are gone.
DP
#7 Frank Gore
He has a history of injuries, he’s playing for a head coach who’s offensive awareness is akin to a fifth grader doing calculus, (let’s put it this way, I’d rather exhume Bill Walsh and have him run the team with Coach Hitler as the defensive coordinator, and you think I’m kidding) and an offensive coordinator who couldn’t properly use one of the top five running backs in the history of the NFL.
The 49ers have no other offensive weapons, don’t have an NFL caliber QB, and have one of the worst offensive lines in the league, but other then that I like him allot…
NTF
#8 Ryan Grant
He’s legit. He ran really well last year, he’s young, has allot of tread left on his tires, the offense should revolve around him, and I think the packers will be a playoff team You should be able to pick him in the mid second round in a ten team league. I’ve got a good feeling on this one. The same feeling I had with Reggie Bush last year.
(Forget I just wrote that)
. This pick is all about feel. Since I’m drafting all the teams and I love Grant I know I’m going to pick him with another team before NTF’s 2nd rounder(Of course, even with myself these things don’t always turn out see what happens after pick 27). In a league where I’m not worried about Grant being taken by the next two teams I just might pick Moss and hope to take Grant a few picks later. In allot of ways a live draft is like poker. You’ve got an idea of who you’re playing against, what guys they like and what they might do. This is especially important with the 2nd, 3rd, 8th, and 9th picks.
FVLS
#9 Randy Moss
I’m pretty sure he’s the number one wide receiver. I don’t feel that way about Brady, and I don’t see any difference between the next few RB’s.
VF
#10
Last time he was drafted in the top ten he missed half the season…there’s always backs taken in the first round who breakdown and kill their teams, some you can predict(Johnson, Alexander), others you can’t(Jackson). I honestly can’t tell if I have reason to be worried, or if I’m being paranoid...
VF
#11 Tom Brady
He’s not going to throw 50 td’s again. 25-35 is more likely. After the Super Bowl you have to figure the Pat’s are gonna even out the offense so teams can’t just tee off on them like that.
With that being said, there’s a difference between Brady, Manning, Romo, and everyone else. I struggle with quarterbacks. It’s my biggest weakness as an owner and I’ll take him here because I know what I’m getting. I expect a significant drop off from last year’s production, but there’s going to be weeks where he wins on his own.
FVLS
#12 Willis McGahee
NTF
The character guy
#13 Marshawn Lynch
He’s not going to jail. He should be suspended. If he’s not I’d put him ahead of McGahee, and maybe Moss. Even without his legal troubles I’m not as sold on him as everyone else.
Once Lynch is gone if you haven’t drafted a running back yet you’re in trouble.
DP
#14 Reggie Wayne
I’ve had him in the majority of my leagues the past two years, but I won’t be able to get him this year because everyone has caught on. Much like how I was able to consistently draft Andre Johnson as a back up until last season.
I don’t think
CHP
#15 Terrell Owens
It took five years, a suicide attempt and owning Tony Romo, but I’ve finally forgiven him for screwing over the Forty Niners.
I remember his last season with the team fondly. Promptly after declaring he would gather 2000 receiving yards before the season Aeneas Williams lit him up in week two and he spent the rest of the year refusing to go up the middle, short arming passes, and finished it up blaming the 49ers for the fact that he was scared to get hit again and insinuating that Jeff Garcia was gay (who ended up marrying a playmate).
On second thought…That’s why I’m taking Reggie Wayne in front of him.
There’s a drop right here for me. I personally don’t like picking a QB this early, but I think Peyton and Romo are primed to explode.
PAGAN
#16 Peyton Manning
Let’s recap. For the past three years the jackasses at the major networks took sides between him and Brady over who was the greatest QB of their generation, and once Peyton was given the Super Bowl, EVERYONE decided he was better then Brady. Until last year when EVERYONE decided that Brady was the best QB who ever played while the Pats rolled over a schedule reminiscent of a fishy team from the seventys, until he shat himself in the Super Bowl (Oh, he had one drive).
Before I go on I have two thoughts. First, who was the MVP of the Bears/Colts Super Bowl? And it couldn’t be Rex Grossman because he was in a Bears uniform. I can’t remember either. Why haven’t the Bears brought in Uncle Rico for a try out?
Second, there’s no way Joe Montana loses to Eli Manning and the Giants. There’s no way.
As for Peyton, he’s got the weapons (Even if Harrison doesn’t return to form), and Brady showed him up at his own game last year (Running up the score by padding his stats against weak teams, then falling apart at the worst possible moment in the season, which went against his line for his entire career up until that point), so he’s in line for a big season.
Again, I’m in a tough spot. Going by the rules I’ve got to think that I have Addai here, and am also gonna have the 24th pick coming right up. So who would I like to draft with those two picks? Romo, MJD, Johnson, Lewis, Edwards, A Johnson, Fitzgerald, Colston. I’m not taking Romo this early, don’t like any of those RB’s just yet, so who’s my best WR?
#17 Braylon Edwards
Needless to say he’s probably going higher in my draft then anywhere else. If I’m picking anywhere in the second round I’m hoping for Ryan Grant btw.
COLO
#18 Tony Romo
He’s the best player left, but the problem with picking QB’s this early is that you pay for it later (Unless it starts a big run)
SE
#19 Andre Johnson
Last year he played with a guy who wasn’t David Carr for the first time in his career and before he got hurt he was on pace for 92 receptions for 1676 yards and 16 td’s.
Now I might’ve picked LJ here, but with the pick coming back so quickly I can wait to see how the next two picks go and just take the best RB available.
LLUA
#20 Maurice Jones-Drew
Tough spot. I’m taking Jamal Lewis next so those two are really a toss up. Hoping for two out of the Marshall/Holmes/Williams/White/Boldin/Welker group when my next picks come back around.
LLUA
#21 Jamal Lewis
I wouldn’t have even drafted him last year. With that being said his offensive line is one of the best in football, their passing offense looks strong, and I bet you can’t name his back up, so they really have to give him the ball. On top of that, late in the season it becomes difficult to pass in the AFC North so he should be at his best when it matters most.
SE
#22 Larry Johnson
Just because I put him here, doesn’t mean I have to like it. I see allot of 23 carries, 83 yards, 0 td or 21 carries 68 yards, 0 td. Or, I don’t like going over to his house being that I keep hitting my head since his ceiling’s so low.
(For the record I’d much rather pick Fitzgerald here, but I don’t have the balls to draft RB-WR-WR. Or the stupidity)
COLO
#23 Laurence Maroney
Taking Romo means I lose out on Fitzgerald, but I like Maroney. I think he breaks out this year.
#24 Willie Parker
I’m forced to put Parker here because the RB pickings are slim from here on out. For the record the last three picks all could’ve taken Fitzgerald and then played RB roulette with the rookies in later rounds. Which is exactly what I’m doing with the next pick.
PAGAN
#25 Larry Fitzgerald
Unless I really liked one of the next tier of RB’s (Turner, Brown, Bush, McFadden, Jacobs), I’m gonna go with Fitzgerald here. To me him and Colston are the best two non QB’s left and neither one will be around when I pick again. I’m not expecting the RB’s to be around either, but I’m hoping to pick up someone like Torry Holt in the 4th, and then take shots at rookies and guys like Julius Jones later. This pick is a total leap of faith and is completely short sighted. If everyone else is thinking the same way I do I might as well roll the dice with Jacobs here and hope I can pick his back up off waivers when he misses a third of the season.
CHP
#26 Marques Colston
See #25.
For the 27th pick
I’m looking at the next three teams and trying to guess where they’ll be drafting. I need a RB, but would preferably draft him with my next pick. So let’s see:
Team 8 has Grant and Lynch, so they might take one rb.
Team 9 has McGahee and Moss, so they should take one…
Team 10 has Portis and Brady, so they should take one…
That makes me think that 2-4 RB’s will be taken, and the five next RB’s I’d draft would be Turner, Jacobs, Graham, McFadden, and Bush. I don’t want Bush and Jacobs durability concerns me (Bush is alright in PPR, and his upside is still their though)
I think Brees is probably the best player left in the draft, and despite the fact that it leaves you short in the RB\WR area; it’s nice to have a QB that can carry your team on any given week….
I like Turner. But not yet. He might fall to me in the next round.
The two picks in front drafted wide outs, and teams 8 and 10 haven’t drafted a WR yet, which means if I take a wide out they may follow suit and start a run. Let’s start a run.
DP
#27 TJ Houshmandzadeh
I’m not gonna even bother to check the spelling. I like TJ more then any other WR left. Smith hasn’t been dropped enough, and we won’t know where to take him until we see Delhomme throw. Holt’s old, Plax has durability issues, and Palmer may freeze Chad Johnson due to spite (He’s too hit or miss anyway). Plus Welker and Marshall can be had later in the draft.
With every passing day my love affair with Brandon Marshall raises more and more red flags. He just asked me to take out a million dollar life insurance policy last week.
NTF
#28 Brandon Jacobs
I’m avoiding the run and taking my flex. With two RB’s I can take a hard look at drafting a third here, and I can take Brees, but if I don’t draft him I’m probably waiting for the 6th or 7th to draft a QB. I could take a WR, but I might as well wait till pick 32 since I don’t see a big difference with Smith/Holt/Johnson/Plax…so it’s gotta be Brees or a RB. I’m not taking Graham this early (not when I might see him in the 5th), I can’t do Bush yet, Turner’s a little risky, and McFadden plays for the Raiders (Picking Raiders is a mistake).
DVPS
#29 Michael Turner
I have to take a RB here and he’s next on my list. I’m hoping to take McFadden with pick 32, and hoping to go WR (Someone like Welker or Marshall), then RB in the 5th and 6th. I’m really hoping for Jonathan Stewart to be around because I like him allot.
VF
#30 Darren McFadden
God, I hate drafting Raiders. If Justin Fargas could do it….
That’s that, till next week, when I run off picks 31-80. I’ll probably just edit this post with it, but then again, maybe it’ll be a separate post. It doesn’t really matter much when I’m talking to myself…
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